Sunday, August 29, 2010
I hate this weight!
I have been really stressing about my weight lately. I may only weigh 126 pounds, but I was about 118-119 about 3 months ago. I hate weighing this much! I am uncomfortable and nothing fits me anymore. I want to cry when I have to get dressed in the mornings. I haven't weighted this much (not prego) since after I had Westin. I think I even got down to 123 and the last few pounds was the hardest. So I think "What happened?" I got pregnant, but then started bleeding about a week later. Slow at first then got worse. So I was really trying to take it easy! I didn't do anything for a few weeks. I was still upset I gained that much at 6 weeks prego, but I had to take it easy if I wanted to keep the baby! Well I ended up losing the baby and now can't get the weight off. That was about 3 weeks ago. I didn't expect to lose all of it in 3 weeks, but I was hoping for a little improvement! Nope I still weigh the same as I did at my last doc appt. *sigh And I wasn't happy with that weight at the doc appt! I tried to keep positive after the miscarriage. It happened early, we can try again once I have my period, so that is good news. I am glad I was 3 months prego, that would be horrible! But I really think though all this trying to be positive, I was really hurting inside! And that could play a big role in this weight and why it is not coming off! I have been waiting for my period so we can try again, but I still think maybe this will happen again. I feel like I am 1 and 1. 1 miscarriage and 1 baby so I feel like I have a 50/50 chance this will happen again. I dunno. The doctor never said anything about it happening again. We will just have to see. But I am still worried that we may not get prego in the next few months. I am so nervous and scared and worried. And there is nothing I can do except wait and see. And that sucks lol